in an alternate universe / I am 12 / and I do not
seek suffering in starvation / believing hunger
is my superpower / I am 14 / and I do not
spend nine months in hospital / battling demons
no one else can see / I am 15 / and I am not
frozen in a child’s body / I am 20 / and I am not
married / and I do honours in English Literature,
instead of a Dip Ed / because we only get one
wild and precious life / I am 23 / and I am not
a mother / and I am casually dating / the tall guy
from my poetry tutorial / who calls me Hope, after
that time we argued / about Emily Dickinson / and
then made up / over coffee and cheese toasties /
and sure / he breaks my heart later / turns out
he has a thing for all brown girls / not just me /
but god, it was so hot / while it lasted / and he’s still
my favourite fantasy / because who could forget
those fingers / branding me / with poems and desire.

in the real universe / I meet the other version of me,
and we hug in a cafe / and catch up / on years
and decades; she still swoons over tutorial guy
(honestly, who could blame her?) / and we agree
that if we’d known each other back then / we would
have been friends / and when I tell her / I now have
a husband in one city / and a partner in another /
she laughs, delighted / because she was supposed
to be the free spirit / and I was the good girl / and
we decide to share tutorial guy / because surely, he
is the ex I would have had / in an alternate universe.