I write love letters that go in drawers
I sing ballads in the shower
I give words of affirmations to empty rooms, empty seats, empty beds
I am a romantic, I cannot lie
I want to pull you close and plant seeds of how I feel on your lips
I want to spin you around on kitchen floors to songs that mean nothing to me but everything to
you
I want to lay on blankets calling out shapes in clouds with you over wine and homemade
sandwiches

But you do not

So I tell you I will pull back
Let these chains on my heart grow tight holding me against myself
I will endure this pain and let these tears stain my cheeks
I won’t hold your hand
I won’t kiss your cheek
I won’t say I love you
Do not think I do not want to love

Do not think I want to not love
Fore I do
You have captivated me
Grabbed me by my collar and allowed me to gaze, to stare into the everythingness of you
I saw your trauma
I saw your triumphs

I saw you

And I want more
More of this drug you have infected me with
These veins in my arms cry for you and you alone
Other bodies are warm but you are fire
Other bodies mix with mine but you are my puzzle piece
Other bodies sing sweet nothings in my ear but yours are the only ones I believe
So I will be here love
When you are willing
When you are able

When you are ready to love me too